wow... this is strange, I was reading my old bloggs and I couldn't possbly relate to that boy who was blogging, I think I have lost myself.. I havent been as happy as I should for some time now, I keep haing this loathing regard to myself and feeling like im floating in zero-gravity (in a bad-way). I miss knowing like I used to who I was and where I was going, knowing what I feel about this and that and being all ii all a more concrete person, now I'm more like myst or something its like I'm there but not really substantial, it's a horrible feeling.

I am also nervous, I don't know when I'm going to get a reply from Rose Bruford and I'm feeling more and more anxious and certain that I will not be accepted and I'm not sure what I wll do if I dont get ii, if I feel lost now how will I feel without ANY direction...

This is all too strange...

~Spookyo_O needs a map...